Of this and that

A strange painful week that hasn't become any easier as the week progressed. I've not been able to get much pain relief at all lately and it is a little wearing to say the least. The week has been odd but I think that has something to do with the wheel turning. I can smell and feel autumn in the air this week despite it being July. We went into the local park today and a lot of the leaves are starting to turn. Turning golden and rust coloured on the edges. The conkers are growing fast and there were a few underfoot this morning after the winds of yesterday.
I do love Autumn,it is my favourite time of the year, but that doesn't mean I want it to appear just yet. Mr Mog is steaming along on the garden revamp and it is looking very good. I've not done too much of anything, the pain seems to have sapped my creativity but I'm hopeful that my muse will return soon. She is maybe taking a holiday to recoup her creativity, who knows?
The mohair Elsewhere jacket is almost finished, I just have the borders to do now. I may have pictures tomorrow we will have to see.
I wore the aran Elsewhere this morning for the park and it felt great, I loved the effect of the shawl pin holding it together. I now want to do another aran one, dyed in autumn or fire colours I think.
I do still want to make another mohair one using clashing colours but the aran is calling first. If I can get the yarn and get it dyed I may be able to take it over to the Isle of Man with me. It would be suitable knitting for the boat. We are looking forward to visiting, I haven't been since I was 18. Mr Mog has never been. I used to be a photographers assistant on the boat that sailed daily so I went every day for a year. I loved it and enjoyed exploring the island. After all this time I am not sure how much I'll remember. I do remember fairies bridge though.
Part of the discordance has been my son. He has been struggling to keep clean from his drug addiction and the past month has lapsed a couple of times. He is aware of the problem and has asked to see a councillor once more. I am not supposed to know about the drugs, my daughter told me as we try not to have any secrets where things like this are concerned. I know my son didn't want me to know as it upsets me. He told me he was seeing a councillor but didn't say why, sometimes I don't think he realises that saying that screams out that he has a problem:) But being aware means that there is a very good chance he will keep off them once more. The problem is that he doesn't really have any interests apart from fishing, he doesn't socialise well and I know he is very lonely.
As a mother you want to put your arms round them and make things better. I know that this battle is his, not mine and I can only be there as support. I can't win it for him.
It doesn't make for good days though.
Part of being pagan for me is knowing that my pagan path is a work in progress. Working on myself and my place in this time , not changing others. Not even changing me drastically, just working with who and what I am. Part of this discordance comes through as a lesson. It says don't interfere with my son's path just be there for him. Lessons are never easy are they?

Tarot cards this week have been mixed, a state of flux and that reflects my inner self of course. I've spent more time in bed, no early mornings. My body seems to be using bed as a healing place so I'm honouring that choice and going with it.
Not an uplifting post but balance in the world means good and bad so this time you get the bad, sorry:)