Cancer has spread:(
There is more in the previous areas and it has spread to other areas of the back.
Options were:-
1/ drug trial,constant monitoring then chemo as last treatment available
2/ chemo then nothing else but palliative care
3/ An older hormone with side effects that included thick blood and possible leg clots
or 4/ do nothing and not be monitored.
Mr Mog has decided to go with the drug trials as best possible option for now and how he feels. With that he is monitored all the time and if there are any severe side effects he can can come off it at any time. They wanted him to come next Tuesday to sign forms and for all tests but I put my foot down and said no as we had booked to go and see friends and a visit to Glastonbury.
So he goes the following Tuesday to start the thing off. Apparently that will be most of the day with blood tests, X-rays, heart monitoring, more CT scans etc then form reading/signing. He said he would go on his own but that is just not going to happen.
Firstly I want to read the forms as well- two heads better than one, secondly its a long day if he has to wait around in between stuff.
Our oncologist agreed to the delay and said we should lead our usual (??) lives as much as we wanted. The drug trial will work round us so we can still do our own thing and go to Wonderwool etc.
So shellshocked but realistically I knew it wouldn’t be better.
As Mr Mog said” I aten’tdead” its just something to cope with.
PMA as Blue Witch reminded me has a lot to do with things and we have lots of PMA chez Moggie even if it is buried deep sometimes.
This past week has been one of the worst weeks of my life, waiting is so hard and especially waiting for news on cancer.
Of course when you have something major to worry about other things are added aren't they? Had news from an aunt about one of my siblings. As some of you know I don't really have anything to do with most of my family, long story and not worth going into here. Hearing about a member of the family brought major crap to the front of my head, then my favourite cousin who is more of a sister than cousin had health problems and at one point I wasn't sure I could deal with everything my head felt so busy and so stressed.
Morning pages and a very understanding husband helped.
On a completely bizarre change of subject;-
we went into Sainsburys for a late breakfast after the hospital and they had a display in the front of the store for Mothers Day. All well and good and the usual flowers, chocolates etc. No surprises there but also on the display table a lacy bra and knickers in black? Would you buy your mother sexy undies? No neither would I:)I did ask Mr Mog if he wanted to get some for his mother but he declined. Mind you I think they may have raised a few smiles at the care home as she is 93 this year:)
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12 comments:
The only thing that doesn't stink about the situation is the wonderful spirit you and Mr. Mog are facing this with. Wishing you a fantastic Glastonbury trip, and years of adventures still to come.
You and Mr Mog are facing the future with such strength and courage - I hope I could do half as well if I was ever called to do so. Such a pity I won't see you tomorrow, but give my love to the South West (as you drop down on the motorway to the Levels just say Freyalyn says hi and she'll be back soon) and have a lovely time in Glastonbury.
So sorry to hear your news. I don't blame you trying to lead as normal as possible life. Make the most of the time you have.
What they said, but in Blue :)
The nurses who are employed by the drug companies (often as an addition to, or secondment from, their normal NHS duties) to run and monitor drug trials are excellent support, from what I've heard form those I've known in that situation. A friends' Mum who had breast cancer had a 24-hour number to call if she ever had a problem or needed a chat.
Could I suggest a camera to take copies of the forms you sign, in case they don't/can't give you a copy?
And have a lovely break in Glastonbury. You need and deserve it.
sending love and positive vibes to you both XXXXX
Ah me. We are in a similar place I think. For what it's worth, the longer you last, the more drugs they find to "trial"! My dear FL is quite philosophical about it all. The trick is to avoid the evil side effects, but they tend to cover all options in the list of "possibles". You just need to be vigilant. And stay "well"! Good luck with it all!
What shitty news for both of you to receive. But best wishes for those drug trials! May Glastonbury help to soothe your hearts and spirits.
Reading again I'm struck by one thing...
4/ do nothing and not be monitored.
Why is it that if one refuses their drugs they not prepared to offer support and monitoring? A truly dreadful state of affairs.
Hope you slept better last night, with some definite information now, however unwelcome. At least when one knows what one's dealing with, it's easier (in a know thine enemy type way) than the great unknown.
sorry to read your news, sending healing thoughts and big hugs
I am so sorry that you received this news, and also very impressed by the courage and strength you both have. Enjoy glastonbury- go and take the waters,refresh your spirit and fill yourself with the magic there. Glastonbury at the vernal equinox- a time of rebirth and hope.
much love, Leanne x
Just stumbled upon your blog... this is what my Dad calls The Mushroom Principle, the second you think you get your head out into the light someone comes along and piles a load of *$%" on top!
x
Had a bad day myself (different reasons) and it does seem like one step forward, three back. Best wishes to you.
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